This blog isn't just about me. It's about you. It's about him. It's about her. It's about all of us and about what it means to be us. It's about psychology, mythology, literature. It's about growth, about growing pains, about challenges, and about triumphs. It's about the people I have met, personally and professionally, who have loved me, who have hurt me, who have touched me, amongst whom there hasn't been one who hasn't left me feeling that I am the wiser for having met them. At times in this blog I may refer to my patients, when I do, it is after obtaining their consent, and in such a way that they might be unrecognizable even to themselves. To maintain their confidentiality I have taken creative liberties in recounting my work with them. I have changed identifying details and any names used, but have retained the ideas they have shared with me, ideas that have moved me and have inspired me to write about them. It is my hope that their stories of self-discovery, conveyed through my words, might serve as a torch that sheds light on your journey inward and helps you better write what you would like the story of your life to look like.

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On Forcing Things

by on August 4th, 2013

I am quite certain I alienated most of my peers in graduate school. They had good reason to distance themselves from me. Being intolerably, gratingly competitive, I elbowed my way into receiving a full fellowship in a field of study, clinical psychology, that provides fellowships with reluctance; working as an apartment manager for the housing department for which I was compensated with a free apartment and a living stipend in New York City for 5 years; and various T.A. positions; all of which were highly coveted in the leaner years of the late 1990s.

No, I don’t blame you if you find yourself recoiling from me, and clicking the “x” icon up top. But my observations, self-congratulatory as they may seem patient, forgiving reader do bear relevance on how I have grown.

Reader, can you tell I just read Jane Eyre?

But, as usual, I digress.

I didn’t know then, being a fledgling Jedi, what Joseph Campbell did, “Follow your bliss and don’t be afraid. If you do, you put yourself on a…track that has been there…waiting for you…and doors will open where you didn’t know they were going to be…and wouldn’t have opened for anyone else.”

This post has moved to its new home on Psychology Today. To read more please go to: http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/life-liberty-and-the-pursuit-insight/201309/forcing-things

 

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194 Responses to “On Forcing Things”

  1. I push alot for what I think will help, too much maybe,
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    “Teri kismat da likha tere to koi kho nai sakda..
    Je us di meher hove te tenu o v mil jae jo tera ho nai sakda”

  3. I agree with you 100%. It’s helpful if you have faith. When I got laid off form my regular job in 2009 I thought it was a disaster. Truthfully though, I was sick of living in a cubicle 8 hours a day and missing so much time with my kids. Work has been sporadic since then, but I have done a lot of writing, and my son has benefited from having more of my time. (My daughter is grown and gone.) I pray all the time for God to direct my path and help me stay calm.

    I also keep a quote right on my desk, from Wayne Dyer: “With everything that has happened to you, you can either feel sorry for yourself, or treat what has happened as a gift. Everything is either an opportunity to grow, or an obstacle to keep you from growing. You get to choose.”

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